Lately I’ve been thinking that, contrary to songs and poems and stories, your heart breaks first. That’s how all the love is released, that’s what floods your body and soul with all that warmth and wanting. As soon as you actually meet someone that may very well be the love you’ve been waiting for, your heart breaks then and there, because it’s just too full to hold it all in. There they are; right in front of you and all your love is spilling out, trickling down, becoming butterflies in your tummy. You’ve opened up what you’ve had all along – you’re not waiting for someone else to come along to fill up an empty space. And if you think of your heart as being already broken (in an offering way), then there’s nothing to harm it. You can just Be In Love, and what the object of your affection does or doesn’t do just won’t matter – you’re living in Love, it’s your Truth, and the Power is with you. You can be a celebrant dancing before the God/Goddess of Love, not some cowering slave, always half awaiting the blow. Sure, it’s awful when the love is not returned or when our dream/fantasy/wish doesn’t come true. It’s scary and hard and aching. But if ultimately you know that what you’ve been true to is your own ideal, then you haven’t given anything away – it’s still all yours. Your heart hurts then because it is healing, stitching itself back up again – but only so it can be whole to hold Love again.
[Original Post: Monday, July 19, 2010 at 6:36pm]